Genuine Interest
I'm sure you have friends: family friends, work friends, study friends, even party friends. However many friendships today remain on the polite level: Smile, hold the door, pass the salt, a slap on the back, a shared cup of tea, a beer together...
Genuine friends go beyond that. They are truly interested in knowing how you are doing, and find many ways to show you that. For example waiting 20 minutes before asking "How are you?" instead of asking right away and having them answer "fine thanks, you?" link
Growth in Virtue
I remember driving with a friend. He asked me a pointed question. "Are you open for a few tips on how to drive better?" I was okay with it - was also extremely humbled that he asked my permission first. He showed true interest in helping me grow, and accompanied that interest with humility. Today I'm a better driver because of it.
This is worlds apart, of course, from that nerved spouse who puts her hands on her hips and shouts at her nervy husband: "I am sick and tired of your...!!!" Genuine friends are not only concerned with what might bother them, but in helping you see where you can grow.
Discovering Qualities
A young man I once knew was extremely insecure. He thought he was a failure in so many ways. He remained oblivious to the fact that all of his friends looked up to him. What he said and did were imitated by those around him in a natural way. It took someone from the outside, however, to help him realize the leadership qualities he had.
As one of MY best friends recently said: "Friends are honest with us because they love us." Yes, it's so true, the genuine friend helps you become the best version of you.
So where are we going with this?
Who, may I ask, is THE friend par excellence? Jesus Christ! It's interesting to find that he fulfills all three characteristics from above: 1. Genuine interest in you like no other 2. He shows you who you are and helps you constantly grow in love 3. He is the one who created you in the first place and knows what he has called you to do.
Which brings us to a very simple but solid conclusion. To be a genuine friend for those around you, you must first experience the love and care of THE genuine friend.
I'm sure you have friends: family friends, work friends, study friends, even party friends. However many friendships today remain on the polite level: Smile, hold the door, pass the salt, a slap on the back, a shared cup of tea, a beer together...
Genuine friends go beyond that. They are truly interested in knowing how you are doing, and find many ways to show you that. For example waiting 20 minutes before asking "How are you?" instead of asking right away and having them answer "fine thanks, you?" link
Growth in Virtue
I remember driving with a friend. He asked me a pointed question. "Are you open for a few tips on how to drive better?" I was okay with it - was also extremely humbled that he asked my permission first. He showed true interest in helping me grow, and accompanied that interest with humility. Today I'm a better driver because of it.
This is worlds apart, of course, from that nerved spouse who puts her hands on her hips and shouts at her nervy husband: "I am sick and tired of your...!!!" Genuine friends are not only concerned with what might bother them, but in helping you see where you can grow.
Discovering Qualities
A young man I once knew was extremely insecure. He thought he was a failure in so many ways. He remained oblivious to the fact that all of his friends looked up to him. What he said and did were imitated by those around him in a natural way. It took someone from the outside, however, to help him realize the leadership qualities he had.
As one of MY best friends recently said: "Friends are honest with us because they love us." Yes, it's so true, the genuine friend helps you become the best version of you.
So where are we going with this?
Who, may I ask, is THE friend par excellence? Jesus Christ! It's interesting to find that he fulfills all three characteristics from above: 1. Genuine interest in you like no other 2. He shows you who you are and helps you constantly grow in love 3. He is the one who created you in the first place and knows what he has called you to do.
Which brings us to a very simple but solid conclusion. To be a genuine friend for those around you, you must first experience the love and care of THE genuine friend.
A friend is one that knows who you are, understands where you've been, accepts what you have become, and still gently allows you to grow.
- William Shakespeare
Of course, Jesus Christ is my first and lifelong genuine friend. People do not realize that genuine friends are a very select few. It took me years to realize this. I can count mine on one hand - there are three, and we give one another support and unconditional love, plus we enjoy one another's company. There's love and laughter, plus the confidante whose advice you trust. And, no matter what, they come when you call. Thank God for giving me three genuine friends. When I had one, I thought that was exceptional; but now, how very blessed am I ♥
ReplyDeleteAmen....
ReplyDeleteit's a ped-peeved of mine when people ask right away "how are you" when I can totally tell it's just "a saying" and they truly don't want to hear my response.
So when I asked "how are you?" i truly want to know how they are doing. when i see somebody, I say hi. I don't go with the pleasantries of "how you doing" esp if I know I am already "on-the-go".